It has been a long week. With the Celebration for Nathan on Thursday and the Memorial on Friday that weighed on all of us all week. Just his death and all the why questions. Traumatic events also bring up memories in my kids that have to be dealt with. I was surprised at really how few things came up this time. So much wonderful healing God has done in them. Even through this I see healing mainly in S.
As she talked about the fear she felt over Nathan's death. We prayed and I ask her to focus on that fear she felt as she watched Nathan die. Then we prayed and allowed God to take her back to the root of her fear. She had two times in her young life she had witnessed death in a child. TWO! One she has physical scars from as she and another child were hit by a car riding bikes. She was thrown over the car while the other child went in the windshield. She broke her arm the other child died. The other time a child was hit by a car in front of her. A cousin I think. She was 5 or so and the child that died was 4. In both instances she carried guilt that it was some how "her fault" they died. As we prayed and she relived each event God showed her how she wasn't at fault. That she was also a child. After this her "fear" was gone. Yes, she was still very sad and grieved, but some how it was different. Healing! I pray this healing over Nathan's family.
Now on to more better things :) Yes, I said more better! Gotta be right! We were approached about sending our homestudy on some kids this week. I got the email while half my kids were reading over my shoulder. They went NUTS! Saying "YES! Yes! YES!!!!!!" So after sharing it with DH we (I) gave the go ahead. Now it is in God's hands. Our case worker ask for a family picture. God provided one in the form of our Adoption day with S. :) If you know us you know some of us AVOID cameras. I sent that picture and ask the case worker if she wanted more. She "suggested" maybe having each child send a picture page and a brief paragraph about what their life is like and what they want in siblings. So that is the weekend project. Prayer again for God's will. If it is God's will then he will have to do some very interesting door opening. I am just setting back watching this. I KNOW God is working! We will see if I heard correct or not.
I am so enjoying using the skid loader. For those that don't know a skid loader is a baby bulldozer with wheels instead of tracks. It is my muscle. I had three 250 lb tubs of molasses supplement for the stock I needed to move yesterday morning before we went to town. I pulled the skid loader up in front of the tubs and allowed MJ to roll them into the bucket. Then off I went with him opening gates to dump each one where it needed to be. This was a quick and almost painless job. This after unloading a ton of feed earlier in the week with it. Not only unloading but filling a feeder! Yea!!! I told DH last night I really would like hay forks to go on it. I could get into a lot more trouble if I had those :) I have a feeder I want to move, can't move it without them, already tried. Then a little shed that I want to move..... Yea I can get in lots of trouble with forks. Today I need to use it to move cottonseed trash into a different pen. The downside is the wind is blowing the wrong direction for this to be a fun or easy job. I may wait in hopes of the wind shifting.
Weekend plans.... FREEZER! DH had to work this morning and will bring home a ditch witch this afternoon. We are digging the ditch from the pole to where the units are setting. Then he is hooking the power up. After that, sometime next week we need the guy to come out and hook the units up. From there we need shelves. Not that I am above sticking stuff in there in boxes. I am starting to plan how I want to redo the pantry once we remove freezers and refrigerator from it. It will free up a LOT of space.
We have a 40% chance of rain this week. I ask all of you to stand in agreement with me that it will not only rain, but will be the beginning of a long period of rain. Enough to break the drought and refill the lakes and refill our underground water table. My idea of long term is a season of 50+ years of better than average rains! Please pray that we get rain. For those that want to see how dry different areas are here is a great link: http://drought.unl.edu/dm/monitor.html
For other exciting news check out my DIL's blog. http://bsjonesjourney.blogspot.com/
1 comment:
We have so much in common. We live in the country. Our mini-farm is on 3 acres. We have a baker's dozen goats and a handful of chickens.
I am praying for S and the baby's family. Such a tragic accident. It is often hard even for mature Christ folowers to deal with the death of a child. My neice drown at the age of 3 in her swimming pool. She slipped out the back door, was riding her tricycle and fell in. There was lots of misplaced guilt. It was difficult to get back to "normal."
We just got a placement of 5 children. I envy you. We live in a state where the maximum kids allowed by DSS is 5 or I would definitely take another child. I believe that taking in children is my calling from God.
We also live in a drought ridden area. Our lake is about 12 feet low. We have been without water for several years.
I found your blog a few weeks ago. It has been a priviledge to read about your life. You have given me hope that our topsy turvy family can work.
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