Thursday, January 14, 2010


As I watched my kids and grand children go about their day today I was struck by how much education takes place here. Just a few minutes ago MJ was reading the colors off the pencil colors for 2 yo grand son as he avidly listened and try to repeat them.

This morning I watched 5 children in the kitchen. It looked like chaos, yet if you looked close two were busy breaking and cooking eggs, two were busy making chocolate milk in the vita mix from scratch, and 1 was cleaning up the milker from milking this morning. Yet less than a month ago 2 of the children had never cooked. I do shut my eyes as I watch eggs being broke from about a foot above the cup they are to land in.

I see positive change in my child that is so resistant to the word "NO". He is learning love and logic and doesn't seem to like it much. Yesterday he flat refused to fill buckets with cow feed. Now this isn't a hard task. Take a 3 lb coffee can fill it with feed and pour it in a 5 gallon bucket. Do two 3 lb coffee cans per cow. One reason I have him do this is it is great for motor skills. I learned when we first got MJ and were dealing with lots of motor and sensory issues that what country people think of as "normal" child play/work is basically what is done to help sensory and motor skills. Back to Mr. B. He refused, I had two options wait him out, or come up with a choice for him. At that point I was going to have to get better to die so waiting him out didn't seem such a good option. So I gave him the choice of getting cow feed are watching me rest for the day. He wouldn't be playing or doing school, just setting. He choose sitting. So he sat! Not a happy camper he ask to get cow feed. He cussed, he screamed, he told me how much he hated me, he threatened to call 911, he threatened to break my body. ...... you get the picture. Yet, when dad came home he could tell dad why he was setting and how he could make different choices and not have to set. We had spent the day visiting when he wasn't yelling and I was feeling well enough to connect. You know yelling at someone that can't hardly hold their eyes open and when some one is yelling chooses not to doesn't carry much effect.

This morning he was joyful and happy and filled EVERY cow bucket plus with easy. We talked about how it wasn't hard. How he was such a strong smart boy. :) For this child control is a VERY big issue. I find it interesting this is the child I seem to have the in your face control/attachment issues with. I will have to PROVE to him I can keep him safe and I am worthy of his trust.

I gave him a Horizon exit second grade math placement test today. He had issues with money and time. The rest of it he breezed through. Hummmm smart cookie? I see an improvement in all areas of his school work, even writing which is still a LONG way from even OK. I wonder again if control was the motivating factor.

TD is making great grades on the SOS lessons but bombing the quizzes. I changed his school work to allow open book quizzes for now. I think that will help him get use to this. I did explain to him that he won't get to keep that forever. It is a transition period. He has decided he likes to help put up milk of a morning. That is normally TJ's job. Now both my T's are doing it. She "allowed" him to do the pouring up of milk this morning. He was GLOWING when I came in the door. He was so excited. He is still missing his foster mom bad. He cries for her almost every day. We call once or twice a week and he colors a picture for her and I scan it and email it to her. I did find it interesting he drew her and her husband with big smiles on their faces. I saw that as good. Please keep praying that his grief process in healthy ways and with supernatural speed.

Yesterday morning all of them got a taste of love and logic. I have ask them and they know that they are to be ready to go do chores at 8am. The day before they came downstairs at 8. Yesterday they were a bit faster, but instead of dressing they sat. Not a problem, when 3 boys went to get dressed at 7:58 I pointed out they were out of time and might focus on getting shoes on instead. A couple had shocked looks. I had one girl not dressed she quickly found shoes. The ONE child that was dressed didn't have milker set up which is also suppose to be done by 8. So out the door they went coats, shoes and PJ's. MJ decided to push the limit and hung back and found his coveralls. Only problem with them was they were his about 4 years ago. They might fit B. I nearly ok I DID loose it when he came out the door trying to get his arms in them. Think wounded bird flap. The legs were almost to his knees. I made him take it off his shoulders and wear them all day so dad could see how hansom he looked.

Amazing I had children ready to go do chores this morning. I had gotten up showered, dressed and went back to bed. I came out about 10 till, but I was dressed and ready!

Speaking of chores and milk we are doing the back stroke in milk. I am bring in about 5 gallons for house and 2 for babies every morning. The jersey heifers are doing about 3 gallons together and then my second year milker jersey/holstein is giving a good 2. Top that with the old jersey which I want to sell giving 1 1/2 to 2 every morning. Kids probably drink 1 gallon of chocolate milk and almost 1 of white each day. I cook in spurts with it. I made bread using milk today. I almost always use milk if I have it. Just adding that much more nutrition, and gets 3 1/2 cups out of the frig.

Today we made palm oil popcorn for the first time in a while. I don't know why I hate doing it. It is easy, but I will procrastinate and not. I need to allow kids to. I think they can handle the stove and pot well enough now to do it. It is healthy and yummy for them.

Ok this started out to be about education and ended up just a ramble. I guess most things we do around here teach something. Even if it is dd changing grand dd diaper. She is learning skills that as a mom she will need.

Chore time has arrived again. We are off to do chores and feed babies then feed 2 legged kids. We seem to have way to much leftovers and I have declared no cooking until scraps are ATE. I may make potato cakes with the mash potatoes in there. That will be a treat.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Sarah rachel marie jones here .how are you all doing ? i'm having a blast with biological Mother and working . I need my birth certificate social security card and adoption pappers as soon as possible.