Friday, October 2, 2009

Update on "Parties" and other rambling....

Yesterday was therapy. I visit with the therapist first telling her how I think our 2 weeks has been, any issues we are having, just a general rundown of life. I told her about the parties and how I am seeing a change in MJ. He is more interactive with the other kids instead of "observing". He is making better choices, less parties. She had never heard of a consequence exactly like I was doing, but if it was working.... :)

Then we talked about S and how she is feeling afraid because she can see she really does have a future instead of living for the moment and not knowing what tomorrow will bring. S has talked a lot to me about how this feels so scary. She is also torn in that she has been conditioned by her bio that at 18 she should pick up her relationship with her, no matter what. I am very honest with her and told her if she goes to "visit" her bio at 18 she will be sucked into her lifestyle. She doesn't have the strength to resist yet. It will come, but in time. I suggest she start establishing a new relationship with her on paper first. As we talked a few days ago I had her shut her eyes and ask God to answer the question I ask. As she set there with her eyes shut I ask, "Dear God show S if she is ready at 18 to establish a relationship with her bio or if she needs to mature more." Almost as soon as I spoke her eyes popped open and she said, "I'm not ready!" I told her when she could ask that question and have peace that she is ready she will be ready. I also told her at that point I will have peace also and will help her do it. But, I don't have peace now because I don't think she is ready. I suggested waiting until she is established in her carrier. She liked that as she would have more control if she had a job and all.

After the kids all meet with the therapist I go back in for a recap of anything she sees. With MJ she said he talked about the parties. They make him VERY uncomfortable, but they are also making him make better choices which he is very proud of. He told her about "remembering" to make supper and how good it was on his day. He also told her about "remembering" to take down the chick pen for me. I ask him when we were doing chores if he would do it AFTER school. He remembered! That is huge! She said he explained that all of these consequences we give him aren't mean, that they are because we want him to grow up and be a MAN (said proudly). Then he went on to explain how he wants to be in the military and he needs to stop the choices he is making. While he doesn't like the consequences he is getting they really are helping him learn better choices and he is proud of that. She was impressed with his understanding of consequences and logic on how it really was helping, even if he didn't like it. We haven't gotten to party in TWO days! So disappointing! I am so sick of ice cream :) :P Guess it would take to long to cook a steak for a parity! That sounds better!

Other news............ hummm not sure there is any! Life around here is good. We are blessed! Hope everyone is blessed that reads this today! Pass it on (the blessing not the blog!). Touch a life, change a life with a smile.

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